Forming, Un-forming, and Reforming!

Mindset is defined by the Cambridge dictionary as a person’s way of thinking and opinions. It’s basically our belief system, point of view, and opinions. The way we perceive life and events and relationships with other people stems from our mindsets. Our mindset controls our attitude and ultimately who we are and what we become. 

It’s a powerful instrument that determines the course, pattern, and dimension of everyone’s life. One is either limitless or limited depending on their mindsets. 

The mindset is the whys of one’s making and another’s undoing. It is therefore very pivotal and advised to pay serious attention to how we build it.

Mindsets are formed and can be unformed and reformed. 

Mindsets are mostly created for CHILDREN. This is very instructive for parents. Children come to the world like blank pieces of paper for whatever to be written by whoever and as dry sponges, they soak up and are molded by whatever information is given. 

Parents, teachers, friends, media, and society are the writers of these papers while children just soak in all the verbal and nonverbal teachings on life from events, places, people and circumstances their backgrounds expose them to, positive or not, truth or lies. 

It is hence easy to reform a child’s mindsets as they come to the world clueless and naturally look to parents, teachers, and friends to understand the world around them, having no other point of reference and in no place to critique the knowledge being given them. They ask questions and the answers found (whatever that is) are quietly but surely form their mindsets.

These determine their ideologies and perspectives on life. Our ideologies/perspectives on life determine our attitudes and these define our altitude (success, fulfillment, or failure).

Perspectives about the personal self-concept (who am I), what success means, how life works, love, money, relationships, etc are being formed into strongholds called mindset in our children through different phases of life and interactions.

We need to ask ourselves as parents and guardians what mindsets we are creating for these children. Will it produce for them the kind of life we aspire for them to live? 

It’s their lives we are talking about. If not, Can we backtrack and be intentional about how we present life to our children? Some parents don’t do better because they don’t know better. Can we start with ourselves? We can’t give what we don’t have. Our mindsets influence and reflect on our children. 

So we then need to seek to un-form and reform our own limiting and unhealthy mindsets in order to be able to positively impact/influence our children. This is a life-molding decision that must be taken with all seriousness and a determined action plan. 

In unforming and reforming, it’s pivotal to know👇

Mindsets = Habitual Thoughts + corresponding images + Emotions elicited.

The keyword here is habitual. When our thoughts and emotions become habitual, through repetition and continuous practice, we have set our minds and life outlook on autorun. The more we repeat the practice of dwelling on a particular way of thinking and feeling, the more a corresponding mindset (positive or negative) becomes a stronghold. 

Therefore we ultimately see what we want to see. Hear what we want to hear and definitely become what we think we should be. Whatever we believe, we tend to prove ourselves right over and over again.

So think about it, what mindset do you want to have and impact on your children, about self-concept, wealth, the meaning of success, how life works, core values, etc? 

Find your truth (a good place to start is the word of God which is the very blueprint of life and definition of who we are). Then make it your habitual way of thinking and feeling (emotions) through constant and repetitive practice. Start, do and do it again!

Hope you’ve found this useful. Do send us your comments. Also please send me a DM if you feel the need to join our growing community of ‘Parents Raising Godly Children Community’ (PRGCC) 

I am available for speaking engagements, and mentorship for parents and children (Pre-teen through adulthood).

Thank you